Author Topic: Online Dating Tips!  (Read 8218 times)

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Offline imaspy

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Online Dating Tips!
« on: Mar 25, 2004, 03:12PM »
More people are using computers to find that special someone. Here are some tips to help make your online-dating experience safe and fun:

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Under no circumstance should you give someone you meet online a lot of personal information. You could place yourself in the dangerous position of having a date who knows what a loser you are.

When considering the serious step of marriage, it's good form to seek the approval of the message-board moderator.

Online dating services provide an easy way for recently divorced singles to meet new and interesting people. It's too bad your ex-wife got to keep the computer.

When you write your online classified ad, be sure to make explicit the fact that a sense of humor is very important to you.

Set yourself apart by choosing a descriptive user-name like SocialRetard342, CuteFaceFatAss, or RohypnolLarry.

If you're having a hard time finding a decent, commitment-minded man through e-dating, why don't you try to e-shut the fuck up for once and stop your e-bitching.

Don't just tell women what they want to hear. Type it in all caps.

Remember, online dating is not for everyone?only the desperate and pathetic.

Dates like to know that they're appreciated. Go the extra mile and send that special someone an e-card or virtual flowers.

For best results, try whichever dating service happens to be advertised to the right or left of this chart.

If you decide to break up with your online mate, for God's sake, have the decency to do it over the phone.

If you're a man who prefers younger women, but you only seem to get responses from older women, take heart: Older women can give birth to younger women.

When getting together for the first time, arrange to meet online dates in an open, public place. That way, you can use binoculars to check them out from the car beforehand.

Don't worry. If you actually meet someone decent over the Internet, the two of you can tell people you met at a party.

theonion.com

:)
« Last Edit: Mar 25, 2004, 03:14PM by imaspy »
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Offline Milford

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #1 on: Mar 25, 2004, 08:07PM »
If you're a man who prefers younger women, but you only seem to get responses from older women, take heart: Older women can give birth to younger women.

thats sick

Offline weasel

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #2 on: Mar 25, 2004, 10:57PM »
i thought that was the funniest line in there
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Offline Insu

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #3 on: Mar 26, 2004, 11:20AM »
I've changed my signature in the name of one of those jokes, I love it, RohypnolLarry,  :D
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Offline evenflow_trx

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #4 on: Mar 26, 2004, 11:34AM »
Quote
i thought that was the funniest line in there
hehe, same here m8.

Offline RichTRX

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #5 on: Mar 26, 2004, 11:35AM »
:D LMAO

oh god no that just reminded me...

in SA on late night TV they're now advertising "gaymatchmaker.com" grrrrrrrrrrr it's a disgusting ad for .... people  >:(
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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #6 on: Mar 26, 2004, 11:37AM »
that ad has been on here for months now, heh. Always see it after 12.

Offline bungs

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #7 on: Mar 26, 2004, 11:44AM »
yeah it's bad.

There's also that sms dating shit, @ $3.95 per sms. haha desperate fools

Offline Jtas

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #8 on: Mar 26, 2004, 12:57PM »
in SA on late night TV they're now advertising "gaymatchmaker.com" grrrrrrrrrrr it's a disgusting ad for .... people  >:(

that ad and others have been on down here for ages after 12, its because the ads get controlled by the tv stations in melbourne instead of the local ones, so we get other melbourne ads like car city, hifi supermarket and other gay crap, typical victoria :D :P

Offline imaspy

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #9 on: Mar 26, 2004, 01:26PM »
you love it ;) victoria is going to annex the state of tasmania in a hostile takeover. roll on the fourth reich 8)
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Offline noss

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #10 on: Mar 26, 2004, 01:36PM »
but victoria already thinks that its in a completely different country to all the other states :P

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Offline Jtas

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #11 on: Mar 26, 2004, 01:40PM »
yeah cos your so up yourselves :P


please do not take me seriously, for i am tasmanian

Offline imaspy

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #12 on: Mar 26, 2004, 01:43PM »
hehehe tasrx is taking funny pills

victoria only thinks it is in another country because it feels like we're in another world when we go to certain other states ;)
You have friend, I have friend. My friend go to your house, put bomb under your floor and blow you to fucking sky!

Offline noss

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #13 on: Mar 26, 2004, 01:47PM »
yeh tell me about it.. everywhere in australia i have been is pretty much the same as anywhere else..









then i moved to melbourne. :o

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Offline imaspy

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #14 on: Mar 26, 2004, 01:53PM »
melbourne is where it's at! 8)
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Offline noss

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #15 on: Mar 26, 2004, 02:03PM »
yep. all the crazy shit i only thought happened in america happens here.

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Offline Jtas

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #16 on: Mar 26, 2004, 02:10PM »
out of all of the places ive been around australia i prefer tassie a fair bit more, for various reasons. ;D

so get fooked :P

Offline Ex@B@ybee

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #17 on: Mar 28, 2004, 02:23AM »
When considering the serious step of marriage, it's good form to seek the approval of the message-board moderator.

ummm ryan can we have your blessing please lol..
from kylie and mike...

See that GP in that pic.. thats what i got ;)

Offline noss

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #18 on: Mar 28, 2004, 11:37AM »
hahaha.. no. not yet anyway. you along with all the other tools here must do what i say like the sheep you are. i demand that you run around in circles while standing on your head. mike must have a bath everyday in rogaine to further increase his manly grizzly bear looks.

then you must beat tas.rx like a pinyata. if and when tas.rx explodes and lollies fall out, then you have my blessing.

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Offline Ex@B@ybee

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #19 on: Mar 28, 2004, 12:18PM »
gees your harsh lol..
baaa.. im ment to run around while standing on my head.. holy crap how do i do that..
or do you mean while running around on my hands.. hmmmmm
and mikes in the bath now.. getting grizzly..

*me runs off to find Tax.rx .... then ties him to a tree and beats the crap outta him... woo hoo his got fads and redskins and wiz fizz falling out everywhere..

JACKPOT BABY... :)
now may we have your blessing..
keep in mind if you dont give it ill be forced not to feed you at the reception and ill post pics of you all spiffy like in your suit.. ;) hehehe

See that GP in that pic.. thats what i got ;)

Offline noss

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #20 on: Mar 28, 2004, 12:21PM »
hrmm.. ok then. you have my blessing :P

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #21 on: Mar 28, 2004, 12:22PM »
:) thanks boss..

See that GP in that pic.. thats what i got ;)

Offline Jtas

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #22 on: Mar 29, 2004, 09:49AM »
sorry i must tell the truth here, none of the above happened.  she tricked you into giving you her bleesing, so the whole marriage is going to be based on a lie :D

Offline Insu

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #23 on: Mar 29, 2004, 10:22AM »
Thats alright, as Noss being the admin of the forum he has the legal right to have the marriage annuled. :)

Its geek law.
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Offline Ex@B@ybee

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #24 on: Mar 29, 2004, 02:22PM »
pfffttt.... come on guys dont you want to see noss all spiffy like??

See that GP in that pic.. thats what i got ;)

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #25 on: Mar 29, 2004, 09:43PM »
its not what i want its what noss wants, noss doesnt care what i want , he just uses me cos hes a tool

LOL JOKING :P

but are you really getting married?

Offline noss

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #26 on: Mar 29, 2004, 10:15PM »
well if she isnt getting married i wanna know who the hells wedding i'm going to on sunday

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #27 on: Mar 29, 2004, 10:50PM »
lol,

congratulations, have a good day.

Offline Ex@B@ybee

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #28 on: Mar 31, 2004, 06:41PM »
yup tis i who is getting married... i hope ive remembered everything..

thanks tasR.X.. if it doesnt rain it will be a good day .. :)

See that GP in that pic.. thats what i got ;)

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Re: Online Dating Tips!
« Reply #29 on: Mar 31, 2004, 11:45PM »
oooo... hope u two are together until u get grey and old and enjoy ur lives together...
traction kicked in yo!