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general => the n00bs faqs & safety zone => Topic started by: noss on Jun 30, 2005, 12:06PM

Title: the newbies survival guide..
Post by: noss on Jun 30, 2005, 12:06PM
Newbie survival guide (unofficial, uncensored & un-uber)

In my seemingly boundless arrogance and boredom and drawing both upon my observations of the social interaction between long time members of the forum and newbies and recollections of various posting habits that shit me to tears I have decided to jot down a few hints and tips to get the forum newbies off to an amicable start.

1) DO NOT come here and tell us that your car is the fastest in australia/the world/the universe if you have no proof. You will be flamed and will have less respect than the average newbie.

2) Choose a name carefully, don't try too hard to be uber-anything. It almost certainly won't work. Choose something that reflects your personality or is meaningful to you.

3) Don't use the word/prefix uber.

4) Don't post just to get your post count higher. Nobody cares. Correction, nobody worth caring about cares. The only way you will earn the respect of others is with your ideas, your emotions, humor and knowledge.

5) New members are not permitted to advertise on antrx until they have made the required 15 posts.. New users will also not be able to see the for sale section until they have reached 5 posts. There are very good reasons for this, the main one being protection of antrx members (i.e. we dont want them being ripped off by scammers) and the 2nd is we do not appreciate people signing up for the sole purpose of selling. you want to sell your car and you're new to antrx, advertise it in a paper.

6) Use a spelling/grammar checker. It doesn't take long.




Q) What's wrong with this sentence? I could of gone too a cruise but their where people the're who wanted to kill me because my grammar is two bad and i oun nothing black to were to.


A) It will almost certainly make the grammar Nazi contingent of the forum want to make you bleed from you eyes and rectum. They will either flame you if they are in a particularly anal/pissy mood or they will think you are a moron and silently seethe (which is arguably worse).
See grammar quick ref. at bottom of post.

6) Don't pointlessly resurrect ancient and long dead threads, especially where you reply to some comment made by someone 2 years ago who has probably moved to Japan to shag hot Japanese girls and drive hotter cars. This pisses people off because, the thread is probably no longer relevant and/or you could be dredging up unfortunate comments people made when they were clueless newbies.

7) Feel free to ignore this advice in part or in whole. Who the fuck am I anyway, and besides we all get a giddy thrill out of watching Chadza, SSS and Tas hunt ;D

8.) DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES TELL US SOMETHING IS 'FULLY  SICK  BRO!'

9) Do tell me or anyone else who tries to shove their opinions down you throat or is rude to you to get fucked! In the nicest possible way of course ;)

Grammar quick check:
This is a rough guide to the more commonly misused forms. I have tried to use meaningful examples

Their/There/They're
Their - Means Something belonging to a person/group eg.. "Those guys are ricers! Just look at their neon lights and spinner hubcaps!"

There - Means 'that location'. eg. "You simply aren't intelligent enough to be seen talking to me, please go over there"
Can also be used in the for 'there are' with the meaning 'exists' eg. "There are three people in that toilet cubicle!"

They're - A contraction of 'they are'. eg "They're staring at me, did I blow them off at the lights or something?"

Two/Too/To
Two - Its a number (2), it comes after one(1) eg. "Yes noss, you left their sorry asses at the last two sets of traffic lights, hahahaha"

Too - Means 'as well' or 'also' eg. "Is this a motec system exhaust too?"
Can also mean excessive "One bourbon is never enough and 38 is one too many"

To - To is used as part of a verb or as a preposition eg. "I am going to ask noss if he can make me a custom chip for my pintara"

Where/Were/we're

Where - Means at or in what place eg. "Where have my keys gone?"

Were - Past tense plural of 'to be' eg. "We were all stuck in budgie's car last night cause he lost the keys (go figure)"

We're - Contraction of 'we are' eg. "We're all sheep-shaggers in New Zealand" (sorry fraz)



Resources:
http://www.gothic.org.au (yes i stole this but changed it to suit antrx)
http://webster.commnet.edu/grammar/
http://dictionary.reference.com/

You can do a grammar and spell check in the compose window of hotmail, under tools.
Title: Re: the newbies survival guide..
Post by: Jtas on Jun 30, 2005, 12:21PM
It's sad that this thread is even necessary, it really makes me wonder what is actually being taught in schools these days.

Small, unintentional spelling and grammar errors are no big deal (you may notice a few in this post) but if you're too lazy to bother spelling properly then why on earth should someone else take the time to help you out with information?
Title: Re: the newbies survival guide..
Post by: Chadza on Jun 30, 2005, 12:52PM
Tas and I will be your friendly "minders" in this section. Thats right, this section is the place to introduce yourself to this forum.

Also any "newbie-ish" questions about this forum can be posted here. If its regarding forum technical issues then there is a board for that: go here: http://www.antrx.com/smf/index.php?board=5.0

Basically if you are new to the world of forums, especially car forums then learn the ropes before you go post whoring away. A sensible question will get you a sensible answer! ;)

Chad
Title: Re: the newbies survival guide..
Post by: RichTRX on Jul 1, 2005, 10:07AM
I see the usual suspects were the first to post ;) Welcome all newbies and I hope you all have a nice time here on antrx.com. Basically if you're sensible, noone will give you a hard time here.

-Rich
Title: Re: the newbies survival guide..
Post by: Budgie on Sep 27, 2005, 02:12PM
Yeah, be sensible you asshats! :P
Title: Re: the newbies survival guide..
Post by: ffourc on Sep 27, 2005, 02:34PM
Also search before asking a question!
Title: Re: the newbies survival guide..
Post by: bluesr20 on Apr 1, 2006, 08:27PM
Thanks for the advice.

I've just changed from Toyota to Nissan and am quite rightly feeling very pleased with myself.

U13 AWD Turbo driver.
Title: Re: the newbies survival guide..
Post by: bogan_bob on May 19, 2006, 09:46PM
Good to see a forum that isnt going to be full of rubbish, improper english and people unjustifiably saying their car is the greatest ever ;)
Title: Re: the newbies survival guide..
Post by: *~*Julz*~* on Dec 23, 2006, 09:09AM
how many posts or how long to do you have to be online for, before you can give someone karma?
my grammar at times is probably terrible sorry
Title: Re: the newbies survival guide..
Post by: Kranzy on Dec 23, 2006, 01:50PM
karma i believe is after 100 posts
Title: Re: the newbies survival guide..
Post by: *~*Julz*~* on Dec 23, 2006, 04:49PM
thanks i did find that somewhere after using the search button. i never realised it is so god damn hard to get 100 posts! hehe
Title: Re: the newbies survival guide..
Post by: 311z0r on Mar 12, 2007, 10:58PM
 :-[ I'm such a n00b. This is my first post!!
Title: Re: the newbies survival guide..
Post by: H.M.S. Interceptor on Aug 8, 2007, 12:30AM
alright,

uh-oh i read that list of advice and found myself performing two annoying things; one was that i was posting pointless posts just to get to thirty so i could show off my car (i even said this in one post) and i was ressurecting looong dead threads - in full knowledge regardless of the impending pointlessness of my post that would result! so, no more pointless posts i promise...hahaha i just did it again owww...
Title: Re: the newbies survival guide..
Post by: blowsmoke on Aug 20, 2007, 03:56PM
I like these words; giddy, thrill, asshat.   Surely i have found u12 nirvana.
Title: Re: the newbies survival guide..
Post by: 311z0r on Oct 28, 2007, 11:06AM
haha it's funny how some of the forum members with hundreds of posts don't abide by a number of those little rules, especially the one relating to grammar!!
Not to say we shouldn't be caring..
Title: Re: the newbies survival guide..
Post by: arxdemon on Oct 14, 2008, 02:48PM
i can respect that.....
Title: Re: the newbies survival guide..
Post by: shags on Nov 10, 2010, 10:37PM
hey guys,
 my names shags or u can call me babs which is short for busted ass bluebird lol,im new to forums and this forum so i have no idea how to use em but i will learn and hopefully gane some much needed bluebird knowledge.i own a 93 u13 sss which is stock apart from usaul filter and bodgy ass performance chip that i dont think i installed properly aswell as my new distributer.apparently its a common problem that bluebird dizzy's get oil in them which i learnt the hard way lol anyways its all fixed now(sort of).its got 280 on the clock and paint fade on the roof which is hardly noticeable when ur sitting in that plush interior that i have with no burns,rips or tears at all which is funny enough for a chain smoker ! my interior is immaculate love the woodgrain touch.its lowered on 16inch pcw's and the worst suspension you've ever experieced ! but u know what if you offered me 7grand i wouldnt sell it...8k i might think about it.i love my bluey that i bought for 1500 with no rego and flatspots.cruise control and heads up display just makes this a real comfy car a beautiful driving experience.its a loyal car which will get about 15k spent on it as soon as i get off my busted ass and get a permanent job!! plans for future ....KA-T ! only thing in the way is my license,green p's means no turbo so going to write into the rta for an exemption form to drive turbo's,v8's and supercharged so my turbo life is depending on that...wish me luck lmao
ok now for a tech question : what colour is the signal wire on the maf senor ...this will help me work out if i have plugged in my busted ass performance chip correctly?? nice to meet ya guys and help would be much appreciated...cheers from shags in sydney australia !!
Title: Re: the newbies survival guide..
Post by: rsjdhj on Jun 28, 2012, 01:01PM
haha it's funny how some of the forum members with hundreds of posts don't abide by a number of those little rules, especially the one relating to grammar!!
Not to say we shouldn't be caring..
Title: Re: the newbies survival guide..
Post by: 4hire on Jul 22, 2013, 03:40AM
how many signature can i set?
Title: Re: the newbies survival guide..
Post by: pedro666 on Jul 22, 2013, 02:42PM
2 i think..